Quote of the Week
“Life is something like this trumpet. If you don’t put anything in it, you don’t get anything out.”
– W. C. Handy, blues musician
Jokes of the Week
Our Mexican maid asked for a pay increase.
My wife was very upset about this and decided to talk to her about the raise.
She asked: ‘Now Maria, why do you want a pay increase? ‘
Maria: ‘Well, Senora, there are three reasons why I want an increase. The first is that I iron better than you.’
Wife: ‘Who said you iron better than me?’
Maria: ‘Your husband said so.’
Wife: ‘Oh.’
Maria: ‘The second reason is that I am a better cook than you.’
Wife: ‘Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?’
Maria: ‘Your husband did.’
Wife: ‘Oh.’
Maria: ‘My third reason is that I am a better lover than you.’
Wife: (really furious now): ‘Did my husband say that as well?’
Maria: ‘No Senora…the gardener did.’
Wife: ‘So how much do you want?’
July 26, 2009
Lessons in Logic
If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
it’s your stupidity.
I was born intelligent –
education ruined me.
Practice makes perfect…..
But nobody’s perfect….. .
so why practice?
If it’s true that we are here to help others,
then what exactly are the others here for?
Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.
How come ‘abbreviated’ is such a long word?
Money is not everything.
There’s MasterCard & Visa.
One should love animals.
They are so tasty.
Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in
life.
The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become otherwise.
Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.
Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.
‘Your future depends on your dreams’
So go to sleep
There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning
‘Hard work never killed anybody’
But why take the risk
‘Work fascinates me’
I can look at it for hours
God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.
The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn.
A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station….
what more can I say……..