The Minnesota State Fair

Diary Entry For August 24, 2008

On Saturday, we took Grandma Linda and her new friend, George, on a boat ride.  We haven’t seen Grandma Linda much since she and George started hanging out together which has been a little bit difficult on the family.  It’s just so hard watching the little ones grow up and start going out on their own!

On Tuesday night, we celebrated Miss Sheri’s birthday by doing something really wild and crazy like taking Sunny for a walk to the dog park!  While we were there, we stood and watched this telephone pole for quite awhile.  It has a recently installed “Squirrel Guard” which prevents the little critters from climbing up the pole and getting electrocuted.  We tried really hard to attract one over so we could test it out, but we had no luck.  Our squirrel calls just weren’t working.

On Friday night, the Nor-Tech gang got together for our 2008 Fantasy Football Draft.  I’m pretty pleased with my team this year after drafting Brian Westbrook, Larry Johnson, Donovan McNabb, Roddy White, and Bernard Berrian among others.  I’m thinking the Fantasy Championship is well within my sights!  Are you ready for some Football?

Famed Shortarmguy stalker, Steve “Cuds” Cuddihy, and his lovely wife, Melissa, were our hosts for the evening.  Steve has been our Fantasy Commissioner for the past few years and really knows how to run a league!  I’d be proud to let this man fulfill my fantasies any time!

On Saturday, the Shortarmguy Family loaded up and headed to the Minnesota State Fair for the Great Minnesota Get Together!  We didn’t bring Homer with us, but bumped into him while we there.

I love the state fair!  Where else can you watch a dog being neutered while eating chocolate covered bacon on a stick?

Luke really loved the Butterfly House.  He tried to get even more to stick to the front of his shirt, but they soon all started flapping their wings at the same time causing him to lift up in the air a little, so he stopped.

Avery was more than willing to go up in the air a little after being strapped to a bungee cord hovering above a trampoline.  Ahhhhh, the things we do for fun!

The boys really enjoyed going to the animal barns where we saw horses, cows, and even a baby sheep being born!  It was pretty neat watching their cute little expressions as they witnessed the miracle of birth and then getting to see the Mama sheep eating the leftover placenta when she was done.  It was just so sweet!

I gotta get me one of these.

We thought this picture would be really funny until shortly afterwards when I spilled this cheesy steak sandwich all over my nice, white shorts.  It was really fun walking around the fair for the rest of the day with bright orange splotches all over my crotch. 

All in all, it was a good day at the fair. 

Have a great week!!

The Olympic Gymnast

The Dangers of Showing Off

The Dangers of Wearing Low Pants

Why I Love The Olympics!

Well, I certainly hope not.

Half Priced Apples

What a nice monkey!

Real Windows

Can’t understand why these Gummi Lighthouses never took off…

This is so romantic.

Nice Emails of the Week

Dear SAG:   You probably don’t remember, but I wrote you two years ago about my really lousy diagnosis.  I had to have a bilateral mastectomy, (my 38 Double D-s were reduced to 36B-Flats…:) and the maximum chemo and radiation.  Had any number of problems, falling white count, radiation burn, lost 30 lbs (doc made me gain it back, what a drag. hahah. NOT) and all in 6-7 months.  But I am NOT complaining, since I am ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!

Any time I start to feel sorry for myself, I got to your web site.  I see how you have coped all your life, and what a wonderful family you have, and I STOP feeling sorry for myself, and look at my wonderful family, and absolutely devoted spouse (over 52 years now) and I know I am truly blessed, as are you.


SO…keep it coming.  I may not respond to your emails very often, but I read every last page, when I can hold up to get online.

Just know that somewhere in Florida there is a 76+ y/o gal who thinks you are TOPS.  🙂

Now, did that make your day. Ha ha. Just kidding…just kidding.

Hug your beautiful boys for me.  Tell them it is from a little old lady who has NO grandsons…only 5 granddaughters.  🙂

With much affection


PS…one of the major side effects of all my treatment is short-term memory loss.  Sometime tomorrow I will remember you first name.  (Blush)


Quote of the Week

“Nothing is more expensive than a missed opportunity.”

— H. Jackson Brown, Author

Jokes of the Week

A young boy comes down for breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he has done his chores.

‘Not yet,’ said the little boy.

His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores.

Well, he’s a little ticked off so when he feeds the chickens, he kicks a chicken. When he feeds the cows, he kicks a cow.

When he feeds the pigs, he kicks a pig.

He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.

‘How come I don’t get any eggs and bacon, and why don’t I have any milk in my cereal?’ he asks.

‘Well,’ his mother says, ‘I saw you kick a chicken, so you don’t get any eggs for a week.

I saw you kick the pig, so you don’t get any pork or bacon for a week either.

I saw you kick the cow so for a week you aren’t getting any milk.’

Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.

The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, ‘You going to tell him or should I?

Shortarmguy’s Favorite Websites

August 24, 2008

Trailer of new movie “W”  Looks pretty funny!

I also want to see Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist

Footage of the guy who lost to Michael Phelps

Shortarmguy’s Emails To Make You Think

Email Shortarmguy at

August 24, 2008

PARENT – Job Description

Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop


Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an,
often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent
communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable
hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour
shifts on call.   Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities!  Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.


The rest of your life.

Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5.

Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.

Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go
from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams
from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.

Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small
gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers.

Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of
multiple homework projects.

Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of
all ages and mental outlooks.

Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next.

Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap,
plastic toys, and battery operated devices.

Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.

Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end

Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work
throughout the facility.


None. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without
complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those
in your charge can ultimately surpass you


None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually
exhausting basis.


Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon
payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college
will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give
them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme
is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.


While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement,
no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies
limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs and kisses for
life if you play your cards right.