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Diary Entry For November 9, 2008
It was a quiet afternoon at the Shortarmguy household last Saturday, so we decided to head up to Brooklyn Park, Minnesota to see what was new and exciting at Grand Rios Water Park. As it turns out, there wasn't much new. Pretty much the same old water as the last time we went here for a visit.
We enjoyed standing under the massive bucket of water that dumped on our heads every few minutes. The gentleman standing at my left in this photo commented to me that he watched me get my tattoo from Kat Von Di. I tried to explain to him that Kat Von Di was on LA Ink and I received my tattoo on Miami Ink, but it didn't seem to register. So I just thanked him and said that "Yes, Kat did a hell of a good job!"
We had a lot of fun on the lazy river. After awhile of being lazy, we decided we wanted to get some exercise and dump our tubes to swim against the current. The lifeguards then told us our actions were illegal. I tried to tell them that it wasn't good for our society to try to force people to be "lazy" and rely solely on the efforts of the water, but sadly my pleas fell on deaf ears. What a pity.
Avery and I tackled all of their wildest rides and both agreed that the Hurricane Plunge was the scariest! Riders on this slide travel down a dark, three-story, serpentine tube, traveling at speeds up to 45 miles per hour, they then swirl around a funnel-shaped bowl, then finally splash down into a plunge pool. I thought I'd be clever and come out of the tube with my hands and head held high in the Shortarmguy pose, but was stunned back into reality when my head slammed back hard onto the plastic surface. That will learn me.
Avery laughed at this picture because he thought it looks like he has boobs like a girl in it. I told him I didn't see it, but just in case he needed to start wearing a bikini top when we go to the water park in the future.
Luke's not really big into sliding down the dark tunnels, so he and Miss Sheri hang out while we go off on our adventures. When I came back to find him later, I found him sitting on this fountain. I tried to tell him that although it is important to maintain a clean colon for long term health, he probably didn't need to worry about such things at his age. He just gave me a confused look and went back to resume his enema.
Miss Sheri and the boys play a game in the hot tub where they each pass gas and then try to guess which bubbles are real and which ones they personally generated. I tend to avoid them when they play this game.
On Tuesday morning, the Shortarmguy Family exercised our civic duty to go out and vote. Although we were there bright and early, the lines were already very long! I guess people were kind of interested in this year's elections for some reason.
Although I tended to vote for mainly losing candidates this year, it sure was fun waiting in line to scribble on that piece of paper for a few minutes! I even received a little red sticker for my efforts!
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great stuff loved every minute of looking at pages, keep up the great work! Sandy in Australia.
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Shortarmguy appeared on the TLC Reality Show Miami Ink! Watch the episode here and read about my trip to Miami! 2. Prior Lake American Article Other Articles about Shortarmguy Luke and Avery's First Day at School
Shortarmguy Comedy Videos Best of Shortarmguy Comedy Video Shortarmguy Wins Round One Of Twin Cities Funniest Person Competition 7/27/04 Shortarmguy Fights For Your Right To Party!
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Click on the Pictures to View! Shortarmguy's Favorite Videos for November 9, 2008 How to Avenge a Speeding Ticket Treadmill Kitties Shadows of the City
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You just gotta like this picture...
Separated at Birth?
I think our education system is just fine!
I swear I see a nut on this tree...
Moon Music
For some reason, I don't have a good feeling about this marriage...
Nice effort, dock dog!
Those girls are just always on my mind...
Quote of the Week "You make the world a better place by making yourself a better person." -- Scott Sorrell
Jokes of the Week
I will never hear church bells
ringing again without smiling.
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Shortarmguy's Favorite Websites November 9, 2008 Todd Swank, vice president of marketing at Nor-Tech, a Burnsville, Minn.-based system builder, was surprised by the move, given Microsoft's history of sticking to its guns when it comes to price. Home Server continues to generate market interest, but the complexity involved in setting up the software has this far limited its appeal to tech-savvy users, according to Swank. "Everyone who uses Home Server loves it, but it just intimidates the hell out of home users," he said. South Park ---- You have to watch this post election South Park episode!!
Vote for Lando Calrissian!
See more funny videos at Funny or Die
McCain vs Obama Dance Competition
Dave Chappelle --- Slavery Reparations.
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Shortarmguy's Emails To Make You Think Email Shortarmguy at Shortarmguy@aol.com November 9, 2008 The Sack Lunches I put my carry-on in the luggage compartment and sat down in my Assigned seat. It was going to be a long flight. "I'm glad I have a Good book to read. Perhaps I will get a short nap," I thought. Just before take-off, a line of soldiers came down the aisle and filled all the vacant seats, totally surrounding me. I decided to start a conversation. "Where are you headed?" I asked the soldier seated nearest to me. " Special training, and then we're being deployed to Iraq " After flying for about an hour, an announcement was made that sack lunches were available for five dollars. It would be several hours before we reached His friend agreed. I looked around at the other soldiers. None Were buying lunch. I walked to the back of the plane and handed The flight attendant a fifty dollar bill. "Take a lunch to all Those soldiers." She grabbed my arms and squeezed tightly. Her Eyes wet with tears, she thanked me. "My son was a soldier in Picking up ten sacks, she headed up the aisle to where the soldiers Were seated. She stopped at my seat and asked, "Which do you like Best - beef or chicken?" "Chicken," I replied, wondering why she asked. She turned and went to the front of plane, returning a minute later with a dinner plate from first class. "This is your thanks." After we finished eating, I went again to the back of the plane, heading for the rest room. A man stopped me. "I saw what you did. I want to be part of it. Here, take this." He handed me twenty-five dollars. Soon after I returned to my seat, I saw the Flight Captain coming down the aisle, looking at the aisle numbers as he walked, I hoped he was not looking for me, but noticed he was looking at the numbers only on my side of the plane. When he got to my row he stopped, smiled, held out his hand, and said, "I want to shake your hand." Quickly unfastening my seatbelt I stood and took the Captain's Hand. With a booming voice he said, "I was a soldier and I was a Military pilot. Once, someone bought me a lunch. It was an act Of kindness I never forgot." I was embarrassed when applause was Heard from all of the passengers. Later I walked to the front of the plane so I could stretch my Legs. A man who was seated about six rows in front of me reached Out his hand, wanting to shake mine. He left another twenty-five Dollars in my palm. When we landed in Soon entering the terminal, I saw the soldiers gathering for their Trip to the base. I walked over to them and handed them Seventy-five dollars. "It will take you some time to reach the Base. It will be about time for a sandwich. God Bless You." Ten young men left that flight feeling the love and respect of their Fellow travelers. As I walked briskly to my car, I whispered a Prayer for their safe return. These soldiers were giving their all For our country. I could only give them a couple of meals. It Seemed so little... A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life wrote a blank Check Made payable to "The
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