I will put a new site on this page each week. This will be a site that either made me laugh my butt off, twisted my mind, or inspired me in some way. If I can’t find a site like this each week, the link will probably lead to a bunch of naked chicks!!
December 29, 2002
Merry Christmas & Merry Christmas Again — These are a couple of fun little web animations celebrating Christmas! The Shortarmguy Family wishes all visitors a wonderful Holiday Season and the Best of luck in 2003 to fulfill all of your dreams!
Ifilm – Have you been to Ifilm lately? I hadn’t stopped by the site in over a year and it’s really become very cool! Every video you’d ever want can be fun here. They even have naked celebrity videos which is always a major plus! I definitely recommend high speed internet access otherwise you’re going to be waiting a loooong time!
Engrish — This site brings you Engrish phrases from Japan and elsewhere in the big world! Those silly Asians and their funny talk!!
December 22. 2002
The Long Arm Guy –This is David. He’s got one long arm. I would kick his ass!
Snake-Byte – I’ve heard of bugs in a computer, but this is the first I’ve heard of snakes in them!
Key-Ball -This is a great on-line soccer game! The computer opponent is kind of an idiot, so you may want to get someone to play against you to make it more challenging!
December 15, 2002
The Mind Reader –This was an HTML file that someone emailed me. It’s turned my computer into a psychic! Follow the instructions closely and you’ll soon find yourself amazed!!
Mr Blue Sky Have you seen the television commercial for the new VW convertible? Go to this site and click “See The Commercial”. I’ve watched it literally 50+ times and find it to be a work of art!
Fling The Cow — Click the button and shoot a cow from a catapult. Or should it be called a cowapult?
Michael Jackson’s Mug — A Photo History of Wacko Jacko’s Face
December 7, 2002
The Real Frodo — Lord of the Rings would be so much better if Jack Black was Frodo!
Shortarmguy made a bunch of new Internet friends this week!
zfilter.com — Must be a very popular site! They sent over 600 new visitors this week!
Internezz — I have no idea what this site says, but they do have a cool picture of me posted!
Dave Log — Picking at the Bones of The Web
szanalmas — This site has sent over 230 Hungarians our way! Welcome!
Shrimp Wars — This site has sent over 115 Belgians our way! Welcome!
December 1, 2002
Toboggan Run — This game will help you get excited for winter! The game is quite sadistic however, because it is much more fun to make the little guys crash than it is to make them land safely!
Stereotypes — Mix and Match the faces!
Museum of Hoaxes — Test your skills spotting real oddities on the internet from fake ones!
November 24, 2002
CUDS — Wild and Crazy Guy, Steve “Cuds” Cuddihy is at it again. This time using his sinister mind to corrupt the image of some youngsters in what looks to be science class. Apparently he based this photo on some of his personal experiences in junior high. Emphasis is added on high.
Bird Strike — First there was the super bird in Alaska terrorizing villagers, now we have kamikaze birds knocking airplanes out of the sky! Check out the scary feet in the first pictures. If last year was the Summer of the Shark, next year is going to be the Spring of the Wings: Birds are no longer content just pooping on your car. They now want to kill us all!
Opera Baby — My boys have been singing this song since they were born!
November 17, 2002
Breaking The Sound Barrier — This is an incredible video showing a jet airplane breaking the sound barrier…or blowing an engine…or shifting gears…or something like that. Ok, I don’t know anything about planes. But this video shows a plane going really, really fast then there’s a bunch of smoke and stuff. It’s really cool!
The Time Travel Fund — Your ticket to the future! The basic concept for this site is that some day far in the future, time travel will be cheap. If you invest a small amount of money in their fund and let compound interest do it’s magic over a few hundred years, your descendents will be able to use this money to buy you a ticket to the future. But you’ll have to fly coach.
Kory’s Man, Peter Pan — My friend, Kory Madson, sent me several pictures of this fellow. Listen Kory, you don’t have to seek my approval. If you want to ask him out, go for it. It’s 2002, it’s just not that big of deal any more. You might be barking up the wrong tree, though. The guy says on his website that even though he likes to dress up like a famous fairy, he’s only interested in women. But give it a shot, Kory! Maybe you can get him to change his mind! I’ll be looking forward to photos like this from you soon!!
November 10, 2002
Republican Cartoon — A couple weeks ago, I posted a link to a Democrat cartoon depicting Bush pushing an old lady off a Cliff. This is the Republican response. Not quite as clever, but still kind of cool! No matter who you’re rooting for, make sure you go out and VOTE on Tuesday. Remember, if you don’t vote, you lose your right to complain about the results afterwards!
Britney Spears Naked — I can’t believe they can post these photos of Britney naked!
Jump The Shark — I think Shortarmguy.com jumped the shark when he posted naked pictures of himself asking for donations…and no-one gave him a dime!
Shake It Baby — Make sure your browser isn’t set to full screen while this guy does his thing!
November 3, 2002
I’ve got my eye on you! — This Site is creepy!
SpeedStacks — This girl can stack cups faster than lightning! I only wish my wife’s hands could move so quick!
The Clown Killer — A sad and disturbing tale about a guy who just doesn’t like clowns!
October 26, 2002
Super Bird — a bird as big as an airplane has been sighted in Alaska! No one has any pictures of it yet, but my guess is the thing will turn out to be yellow and live down the street from some dudes named Bert & Ernie.
Whizzy For Women — The Whizzy For Women is a revolutionary product which allows women to pee while standing up. The potential applications for such a device are limitless! The neat thing is, you can fold it up and place it in a pocket or a purse to use it again and again. You may want to wash it off first, though.
Signs Movie — The movie Signs summed up in 4 easy steps. If you haven’t seen the movie, this site will save you a couple hours time. If you have seen it, this site will point out for you some plot-holes that maybe you didn’t notice the first time around!
October 20, 2002
BodySCAPES — The human body is beautiful art. Especially when it’s naked.
Parkinsons — This site can test if you have Parkinson’s Disease or not.
Dangle N Shites — This site is a little bit out there, but you gotta check out the Farts page….it’s pretty dang funny! Plus, they were cool enough to list Shortarmguy.com as one of their favorite sites, so you know they have good taste!
October 12, 2002
Social Insecurity — The democrats are getting pretty desperate to resort to videos like this one. They’re depicting Bush pushing an old lady in a wheelchair over a Cliff!! Listen guys, how about an attempt at dignity for a change? Let’s leave the cripple bashing to the professionals like me.
Red Dragon — Red Dragon was an incredible movie! Silence of the Lambs fans can finally get rid of that bad Hannibal aftertaste and get back to being officially freaked out again. Shortarmguy is getting tattoos just like the killer in this movie!!!
8 Mile — Another new movie I’m dying to see. Eminem rocks. Check out this trailer and jam along with the song Lose Yourself. Just like Shortarmguy driving down I-35 with it blaring on his car stereo screaming the words with Slim Shady.
October 5, 2002
Sinkhole — You know you’re having a bad day when you’re driving to work down the same road you drive down every day, and all of the sudden you find yourself having to swim to shore.
Zeppelin Kitties These cats are my Overlords!
Ozzy Talk —Classic Sayings from the Prince of Darkness Himself!!
September 28, 2002
Silo Home — For only $25, 000, 000, you can buy this beautiful home built on top of a decommissioned missile silo. They call it the most unique and secure real estate in the world! That is until the next nuclear war when Russia drops a bomb on your head while you’re sleeping!
American Girls — This music video from England really rocks. It stars Britney Spears and has awesome lyrics like “So I can play with their boobies”!
Man Song — The Married Man’s Anthem.
September 21, 2002
My Big Fat Greek Wedding — My wife and I finally saw this awesome movie last Friday night. It was released in April and not expected to do much at the box office. Here it is September and it’s been in the top two of the weekly charts for 3 weeks in a row! When is Hollywood going to realize that good writing and an inspirational story will draw people in to theaters?
B3TA — B3TA is a website based out of England proclaiming they love the web. Well, Shortarmguy loves B3TA this week! B3TA featured Shortarmguy’s
Exploitation page this week on their site and in their email newsletter. Since that happened less than 3 days ago, more than 5000 new visitors have stopped by to check out Shortarmguy!! Now we just need someone to step up there and offer the $2 million bucks!
Big Black Ben — Protect your car with Big Black Ben. Hey, it’s cheaper than an expensive car alarm system or even the Club!
September 15, 2002
Boobs Hang Low — Groovin’ Granny Shakes her TaTa’s.
Sand Art — Asylum Sand Art Therapy. A psychedelic waste of time. It looks stupid at first, but once you start playing with your mouse and building up those multi-colored sand piles you’ll start having flashbacks to the sixties.
The SCUBA Hotel — The coolest hotel Shortarmguy has ever seen! An authentic underwater research habitat is open to the average person for overnight stays. It’s based within a lagoon and to get there, one must actually scuba dive 21 feet beneath the surface of the sea. Truly not a pleasant trip for the claustrophobic! Haven’t these people ever seen The Abyss?
September 7, 2002
Betcha Click More than Once — I have a feeling the male visitors to Shortarmguy.com will enjoy this site more than the females. Roll your mouse over this nice lady’s shirt for an animated strip tease!! God, I love the internet!
Samuel L Jackson — The collective wisdom of Samuel L Jackson. Well Allow Me To Retort. This Is A Tasty Beverage. It’s all here!
Remote Control Car — Drive a car through a world that is darned similar to Toy Story Land. Hours of Fun!!!
September 1, 2002
Sex Calories — If you ever wanted to know how much weight you’re losing while having sex, this is the place to find out!
Save Karyn — This chick blew a bunch of money on weird girly things, and now she wants you and me to pay for it!! The sad thing is she’s already conned people out of over $8,000 so far!!!! Ben and Bob started
Don’t Save Karyn. I’m with them.
Fish Tank — The only way I’ll take the job is if I can have a fish tank at my desk. Oh, there’s already one on every desk? Well, OK then.
August 25, 2002
POOPBOY — Tickle that Stinky Doughboy! (turn up your speakers)
POP — This site is the log of the first male pregnancy. I don’t know how this dude got pregnant, but I can assure you it wasn’t me. I always wear a condom when I go to those kinds of parties!
Dance, Stephen, Dance! — Stephen Hawking plays the popular Video Arcade Machine: Dance Dance Revolution. Pure Art!!
Nail Box — This site is absolutely disgusting! This weirdo saves all of his toenails and fingernails and then like brings them out at parties and stuff. He plays all sorts of games with them and even puts them in his mouth. Not the kind of person you really want to get all that close to.
The Onion’s Take On The Stock Market — Lou Dobbs Hosts Moneyline from Window Ledge. You just gotta love The Onion!
August 11, 2002
Is it a Ghost? — ABC television affiliate KFSN of Fresno, California ran this news story about a purported ghost sighting at an Oklahoma car impound lot. They show the video and it looks pretty weak to me. It’s similar to a stunt pulled off on the Brady Bunch when Greg tried to scare Bobby and Peter out of the attic to win a bet!
Cool Person test — This site is amazing!! I don’t know exactly how it works scientifically, but somehow it can judge a person’s aura and tell you if you’re cool or not!
Motorcycles Make You Gay — This music video explains exactly how someone who drives a motorcycle progresses into being gay. I’m probably not going to proclaim this at Sturgis for the Harley Davidson festival this week, unless I’m just really bored.
August 3, 2002
Laid Off: Help Wanted — Back on January 10th of this year, I linked to a hilarious video called “Laid Off” at a site called OddTodd.com. The guy that created this video found mega-fame with his website and appeared on all sorts of television and radio programs. He was also kind enough to list www.shortarmguy.com as one of his favorite links, which sent my traffic through the roof! Here’s two sequels to that video called: Laid Off — Help Wanted & Laid Off — Annual Report. They’re just as dang funny!!
MJAU-MJAU — I have no idea what this site is trying to promote, but it’s damn cool whatever it is!
July 28, 2002
2 Way Mirrors —- Good information for those of you who don’t want to be spied on naked!
Gore Vidal — In this disturbing article, Gore Vidal bashes Bush, The New York Times and offers an interesting theory about why September 11th happened.
July 22, 2002
UFO At The World Trade Center — I became hooked on internet UFO videos this week! The video at this link claims to show a flying saucer that was taped at the World Trade Center a year and a half before the tragedy. You’ll need Quick Time installed to view the video. At first glance, I brushed it off as an obvious fake, then I started watching it over and over again. If it’s a fake, it’s a damn good job!!
I then started searching the internet to find people smarter than I am so they could tell me why the video must be an obvious fake. Strangely enough, I found the people trying to make arguments that the video was real were more convincing. This site is one of the more entertaining explanations. For those of you fascinated by The Unexplained, Jeff Rense and Art Bell both have excellent sites dedicated to the subject.
If any of you cool Shortarmguy Viewers have other good sites about this kind of stuff, please email me at email@example.com.
July 14, 2002
WWWeirdness — On Monday, July 1st, all of the sudden Shortarmguy’s daily traffic tripled!! Turns out, the wise editors of this website called Randy’s Web selected Shortarmguy.com to their weekly list of the 50 wackiest websites on the internet! I’m so proud to be recognized by strangers as a weirdo!
Titties and Beer — This could be the anthem for The Man Show!
July 7, 2002
Rapture Ready — It’s the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine! This site claims that the rapture is going to strike without warning. The rapture is going to happen suddenly.
The rapture is going to be one of the most astonishing events to ever occur. I just hope that the rapture is really cool, otherwise I might not show up to watch it!
June 23, 2002
The Quiz — Answer this quiz correctly and your wish may come true!
Lake Desire — These folks are making a movie in Minnesota. It is the story of recognizing that magic does happen everyday. To raise money to finance the film, they’re selling walk-on roles for only $500 a pop.
Shortarmguy emailed the producers to see if there would be any cool roles for a wild and crazy crippled guy!! I’ll let you know if they get back to me!
June 16, 2002
Hunt for the missing Boeing!! — I’m into conspiracies!! I believe the government hides a bunch of crap from us innocent folk out here paying the bills. This website claims a pretty big whopper of a cover-up. I really don’t believe this one. But some of you might…
Cuss Words — This website teaches you dirty words in over 35 different languages. Holy CaCa, that is so cool!
June 9, 2002
Bush Aerobics —- I work out with George W Bush every day thanks to this site. It’s done amazing things for my buns!
Star Wars Fan Films — Star Wars Fan Films. I love this stuff. I’m such a geek!
May 31, 2002
Silly Asians — This takes a while to load, but these half-naked Asian boys sure are worth the wait!
Mini Golf — A few weeks ago, we linked to a cool mini golf game. This one is more challenging and is prettier. Good for at least a few wasted hours at work which should make the boss happy!
Wrecked Exotics — Fast Cars. Fine Cars. Crashed Cars. Porsche, Lamborghini, Ferrari, Dodge Viper, you name it. They’re all represented here and they’re all smashed to bits.
May 16, 2002
Waiting For Star Wars — I waited in line for an hour to see Spiderman the other night. Thought I was pretty crazy to be doing that. Then I saw what these nutballs are up to…
Dance! Dance Dance! — I want to be just like Dancin’ Steve!
May 5, 2002 Emails
SLO MO — The website is called Slo Mo, The Rappin’ Retard. For some reason, the funny junior high kids I work with (especially Nick Rahman) think I remind them of Slo Mo. They swear it’s me “Keeping It Real” with beats like “I got my pants on (all by myself)”. I don’t think Mr. Rahman will find it quite so funny when I sneak up behind him at work and stab him with a butter knife.
Cristie Kerr — For some reason, when this chick wins a golf tournament, it really turns me on!
Driver’s License Search — It’s amazing to me that this site is legal. They can pull up a picture of anyone’s drivers license. I’m calling my senator to put a stop to this crap!
April 30, 2002
April Madness — A tournament for the perverts out there. Call It Hot Chick Pick Invitational 2002.
Pink Slips — You’re the CEO. How many people can you fire in 30 seconds?
April 21, 2002
Female or Shemale? — Thank God I’m married, because I didn’t do so well on this test!
Britney’s Boobies — One of the great mysteries of the world. How big are Britney Spears’ Breasts?
Redneck Neighbors — And you thought you had problems with your neighbors!!
April 14, 2002
Letter from School — Uhh, mom. I got suspended from school again. But I have to tell you, it was really worth it!!
DFILM — Digital Film Festival. Make your own movie online. This is how Spielberg started out.
Joy Of Britney — See all of the Britney Pepsi Commercials. I make it a rule in life to buy anything that she’s selling. She controls me like a robot.
April 6, 2002
Mini Golf — I thought “Big deal, a mini golf game on a website.” Now I’m hooked!
Tug Boat — A day in the life of a drunken sailor.
Tick Tock — That’s one cool clock!
March 24, 2002
Office Pool 64 —- Crazed Shortarmguy Stalker Steve “Cuds” Cuddihy is at it again. This time he may have come up with his most ingenious plot yet. He’s created an incredible website dedicated to March Madness called Office Pool 64. The theme of the site is supposedly a method of picking teams for the NCAA College Basketball Tournament, but I’m certain it’s just cleverly disguised propaganda recruiting people to help him with his mission to destroy Shortarmguy. So check this site out if you’re a College Hoops Fan. Maybe, just maybe you can help me unlock the secret code!
KAZAA — Who needs Napster? This site is an incredible peer to peer file sharing tool. Download and share any files you want including songs, audio books, movies, tv shows, weird and wild videos, programs and more. Anything you want is out there for the asking and with more than 45 million copies of the software downloaded so far, it seems like it will continue to get more and more popular. But I’d go there quick…I can’t imagine this site will be able to stay in operation forever!!
Mystery — My wife almost killed me when I showed her this site! See if you can figure out what’s wrong with this picture more quickly than she did….
March 9, 2002
Chilliman — Name That Beer Bottle! A great contest for all the drunks out there!
February 17, 2002
Project Greenlight —- How can you not love HBO’s Project Greenlight? Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, and Chris Moore throw a contest so some regular dude off the street gets a million (later increased to $1.5 million) to make a movie. Then they create a documentary about the process which highlights everyone back stabbing and belly aching! Hey, fellas, count me in! For Project Greenlight 2, I have a great idea on how to turn my story, The Legend Of Shortarmguy, into an epic musical!!!
February 10, 2002
Al Qaeda — Al Qaeda Recruitment Video. Where do I sign up?
The Mountain — This site houses a collection of sick sites in the world wide web. They have Short Arm Guy.com on there so the rest of the sites have to be good!
February 5, 2002
Pong Wars — The way the game of PONG was truly meant to be played!
Eugene Mirman — Songs from Eugene, The Marvelous Crooning Child
January 27, 2002
Differences — This site shows the difference between men and women.
CollegeHumor — College Humor.com. Your source for nothing. Nothing except for oodles of content provided to make you laugh your ass off!! Makes me long for the college years…
January 20, 2002
Foreigners — This site is from Sweden. I don’t get it.
January 10, 2002
Laid Off — A day in the life of being laid off. If the guy that created this can’t find a job, then God help any of the rest of us that might find ourselves out of work!!
Cameron Crowe Online — The website for the uncool. Cameron Crowe is the greatest movie maker of our generation. He wrote Fast Times at Ridgemont High. He directed Say Anything. He wrote and directed Jerry Maguire and Almost Famous. Need I say more? These are some of the best movies of all time!! I truly believe that I’m Lloyd Dobler, Jerry Maguire, and William H Miller rolled into one body with funny little flipper arms. This website is a great resource for all things Crowe!
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