Shortarmguy's Inspirational Page
On this page, I will post the most inspirational material I receive on any given day. So email firstname.lastname@example.org the best stuff you get. Life can be darn tough sometimes and every now and then you might need a little happiness booster. I’m hoping this page may accomplish that. After you read a few of these, you can push back from your keyboard, throw your arms in the air, wave them back and forth and scream “I’m glad to be alive!” If this happens to you, please send pictures and I’ll post them here!
November 29, 2003
Who Started Christmas?
This morning I heard a story on the radio of a woman who was out Christmas shopping with her two children. After many hours of looking at row after row of toys and everything else imaginable, and after hours of hearing both her children asking for everything they saw on those many shelves, she finally made it to the elevator with her two kids.
She was feeling what so many of us feel during the holiday season time of the year. Overwhelming pressure to go to every party, every housewarming, taste all the holiday food and treats, getting that perfect gift for every single person on our shopping list, making sure we don’t forget anyone on our card list, and the pressure of making sure we respond to everyone who sent us a card.
Finally the elevator doors opened and there was already a crowd in the car. She pushed her way into the car and dragged her two kids in with her and all the bags of stuff. When the doors closed, she couldn’t take it anymore and stated, “Whoever started this whole Christmas thing should be found, strung up and shot.”
From the back of the car everyone heard a quiet calm voice respond, “Don’t worry, we already crucified Him.”
For the rest of the trip down the elevator it was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop.
Don’t forget this year to keep the One who started this whole Christmas thing in your every thought, deed, purchase, and word. If we all did it, just think of how different this whole world would be.
November 22, 2003
Life in reverse
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends.
I mean, life is tough.
It takes up a lot of your time and what do you get at the end of it?
What’s that, a bonus?
I think the life cycle is all backward.
You should die first, get it out of the way.
Then you live in an old age home.
You get kicked out when you’re too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work.
You work 40 years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement.
You do drugs, alcohol, you party, and you get ready for high school.
You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating…
and you finish off as an orgasm.
November 16, 2003
One day a father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing his son how poor people live. They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family. On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, “How was the trip?”
“It was great, Dad.”
“Did you see how poor people live?” the father asked.
“Oh yeah,” said the son.
“So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?” asked the father.
The son answered: “I saw that we have one dog and they had four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night. Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon. We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight. We have servants who serve us, but they serve others. We buy our food, but they grow theirs. We have walls around our property to protect us, but they have friends to protect them.”
The boy’s father was speechless.
Then his son added, “Thanks, Dad, for showing me how poor we are.”
Too many times, we forget what we have and concentrate on what we don’t have. What is one’s person’s worthless object is another’s prize possession? It is all based on one’s perspective. Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for all the bounty we have instead of worrying about wanting more. Take joy and appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!
“Life is too short and friends are few”
November 8, 2003
I don’t believe in Santa Claus, but I’m not going to sue somebody for singing a Ho-Ho-Ho song in December.
I don’t agree with Darwin, but I didn’t go out and hire a lawyer when my high school teacher taught his theory of evolution.
Life, liberty or your pursuit of happiness will not be endangered because someone says a 30-second prayer before a football game. So what’s the big deal? It’s not like somebody is up there reading the entire book of Acts. They’re just talking to a God they believe in and asking him to grant safety to the players on the field and the fans going home from the game. “But it’s a Christian prayer,” some will argue. Yes, and this is the United States of America, a country founded on Christian principles. And we are in the Bible Belt. According to our very own phone book, Christian churches outnumber all others better than 200-to-1. So what would you expect-somebody chanting Hare Krishna?
If I went to a football game in Jerusalem, I would expect to hear a Jewish prayer.
If I went to a soccer game in Baghdad, I would expect to hear a Muslim prayer.
If I went to a ping pong match in China, I would expect to hear someone pray to Buddha.
And I wouldn’t be offended. It wouldn’t bother me one bit. When in Rome…
“But what about the atheists?” is another argument. What about them? Nobody is asking them to be baptized. We’re not going to pass the collection plate. Just humor us for 30 seconds. If that’s asking too much, bring a Walkman or a pair of ear plugs. Go to the bathroom. Visit the concession stand. Call your lawyer. Unfortunately, one or two will make that call. One or two will tell thousands what they can and cannot do. I don’t think a short prayer at a football game is going to shake the world’s foundations.
Christians are just sick and tired of turning the other cheek while our courts strip us of all our rights. Our parents and grandparents taught us to pray before eating, to pray before we go to sleep. Our Bible tells us just to pray without ceasing. Now a handful of people and their lawyers are telling us to cease praying. God, help us. And if that last sentence offends you, well……….just sue me..
The silent majority has been silent too long.. it’s time we let that one or two who scream loud enough to be heard, that the vast majority don’t care what they want.. it is time the majority rules!
It’s time we tell them, you don’t have to pray.. you don’t have to say the pledge of allegiance, you don’t have to believe in God or attend services that honor Him. That is your right, and we will honor your right.. but by golly you are no longer going to take our rights away .. we are fighting back.. and we WILL WIN! After all the God you have the right to denounce is on our side!
God bless us one and all, especially those who denounce Him…
God bless America, despite all her faults.. still the greatest nation of all…..
God bless our service men who are fighting to protect our right to pray and worship God…
May 2003 and 2004 be the years the silent majority is heard and we put God back as the foundation of our families and institutions.
Keep looking up…… In God WE Trust
November 1, 2003
Thank God for Children Saying Grace…
Last week I took my children to a restaurant. My six-year-old son asked if he could say grace. As we bowed our heads he said, “God is good, God is great…. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if Mom gets us ice cream for dessert. And Liberty and justice for all! Amen!”
Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby I heard a woman remark, “That’s what’s wrong with this country. Kids today don’t even know how to pray. Asking God for ice-cream! Why, I never!”
Hearing this, my son burst into tears and asked me, “Did I do it
wrong? Is God mad at me?”
As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table. He winked at my son and said, “I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer.”
“Really?” my son asked. “Cross my heart,” the man replied. Then in a theatrical whisper he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing), ” Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes.”
Naturally, I bought my kids ice cream at the end of the meal. My son stared at his for a moment and then did something I will remember the rest of my life. He picked up his sundae and without a word, walked over and placed it in front of the woman.
With a big smile he told her, “Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes; and my soul is good already.”
I loved this story! Please keep it moving. Sometimes we all need some ice cream. I hope God sends you some Ice Cream today.
October 19, 2003
A water bearer in China had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole which he carried across his neck.
One of the pots had a crack in it, while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water.
At the end of the long walk from the stream to his home, the cracked pot arrived only half full. For a full two years this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water to his home.
Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do.
After 2 years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. “I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house.”
The bearer said to the pot, “Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of the path, but not on the other pot’s side?
That’s because I have always known about your flaw, and I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you’ve watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my table.
Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace my home.”
Moral: Each of us has our own unique flaws. We’re all cracked pots. But it’s the cracks and flaws we each have
that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. You’ve just got to take each person for what they are,
and look for the good in them. . .
We are ALL cracked pots!
October 11, 2003
I sat in my seat of the Boeing 767 waiting for everyone to hurry and stow their carry-ons and grab a seat so we could start what I was sure to be a long , uneventful flight home. With the huge capacity and slow moving
people taking their time to stuff luggage far too big for the overhead and never paying much attention to holding up the growing line behind them, I simply shook my head knowing that this flight was not starting out very well. I was anxious to get home to see my loved ones so I was focused on “my” issues and just felt like standing up and yelling for some of these clowns to get their act together. I knew I couldn’t say a word so I just thumbed thru the “Sky Mall” magazine from the seat pocket in front of me. You know it’s really getting rough when you resort to the over priced, useless sky mall crap to break the monotony.
With everyone finally seated, we just sat there with the cabin door open and no one in any hurry to get us going although we were well past the scheduled take off time. No wonder the airline industry is in trouble I told myself. Just then, the attendant came on the intercom to inform us all that we were being delayed. The entire plane let out a collective groan. She resumed speaking to say “We are holding the aircraft for some very special people who are on their way to the plane and the delay shouldn’t be more than 5 minutes. The word came after waiting six times as long as we were promised that “I” was finally going to be on my way home. Why the hoopla over “these” folks? I was expecting some celebrity or sport figure to be the reason for the hold up………Just get their butts in a seat and lets hit the gas I thought.
The attendant came back on the speaker to announce in a loud and excited voice that we were being joined by several U. S. Marines returning home from Iraq!!! Just as they walked on board, the entire plane erupted into applause. The men were a bit taken by surprise by the 340 people cheering for them as they searched for their seats. They were having their hands shook and touched by almost everyone who was within an arm’s distance of them as they passed down the aisle. One elderly woman kissed the hand of one of the Marines as he passed by her. The applause, whistles and cheering didn’t stop for a long time. When we were finally airborne, “I” was not the only civilian checking his conscience as to the delays in “me” getting home, finding my easy chair, a cold beverage and the remote in my hand. These men had done for all of us and I had been complaining silently about “me” and “my” issues. I took for granted the everyday freedoms I enjoy and the conveniences of the American way of life I took for granted others paid the price for my ability to moan and complain about a few minutes delay to “me” those Heroes going home to their loved ones.
I attempted to get my selfish outlook back in order and minutes before we landed I suggested to the attendant that she announce over the speaker a request for everyone to remain in their seats until our hero’s were allowed to gather their things and be first off the plane. The cheers and applause continued until the last Marine stepped off and we all rose to go about our too often taken for granted everyday freedoms…….. I felt proud of them. I felt it an honor and a privilege to be among the first to welcome them home and say Thank You for a job well done. I vowed that I will never forget that flight nor the lesson learned. I can’t say it enough, THANK YOU to those Veterans and active servicemen and women who may read this and a prayer for those who cannot because they are no longer with us. GOD BLESS AMERICA! WELCOME HOME! AND THANKS FOR A JOB WELL DONE !!!!!
October 5, 2003
SOMEBODY SAID …….
Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you’ve had a baby . . .”Somebody” doesn’t
know that once you’re a mother, normal is history.
Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct . . .somebody never took a two-year-old shopping.
Somebody said being a mother is boring . . .somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a learner’s permit.
Somebody said if you’re a “good” mother, your child will “turn out good”…somebody thinks a child comes with an instruction manual and a guarantee.
Somebody said “good” mothers never raise their voices . . .somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child getting ready to jump off the garage roof.
Somebody said you don’t need an education to be a mother . . . somebody never helped a fifth grader with his math homework.
Somebody said you can’t love the second child as much as you love the first. . .somebody doesn’t have two children.
Somebody said a mother can find all the answers to her child-rearing questions in the books . . .somebody never had a child stuff pinto beans up his nose.
Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery . . .somebody never watched her “baby” get on the bus for the first day of kindergarten.
Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back . . . somebody never organized seven giggling Brownies to sell cookies.
Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married…somebody doesn’t know that
marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother’s heartstrings.
Somebody said a mother’s job is done when her last child leaves home…somebody never had grandchildren.
Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you don’t need to tell her . . . “Somebody” can’t be a mother.
Inspiration from the past